Why Writers Need Oxygen Masks Too
The Surprisingly Simple Checklist That Helped Me Break the Burnout Cycle
TL;DR: Take care of your S.E.L.F
There’s more to life than pushing the limits.
Take care of yourself to avoid anxiety, stress and burnout.
A simple 4 part framework will help you cover the basics.
Then become more mindful of that voice in your head.
This morning, I had a run that felt more like therapy than training.
But it didn’t start that way.
It started as a struggle.
I didn’t feel up for it.
I delayed starting.
I felt flat and tired.
Hill sprints in that frame are hard. They’re hard at the best of times. Picture this. You start on a dusty gravel road that curves upward toward the lower reaches of a mountain. You need to sprint up it. 400 meters uphill. And get your heart thumping from a cold start.
It was an absolute ask, and I struggled.
My lungs burned.
My legs ached.
And my heart resisted every demand I made on it to beat faster.
But I did it.
And on the cool-down run back home, the words of the podcast I’d listened to on the way up finally sank in.
I listened to The Art of Charm podcast, specifically the 3rd March episode, Avoid The High Achiever’s Trap with Dr. Mary Anderson, author of The Happy High Achiever: 8 Essentials to Overcome Anxiety, Manage Stress, and Energize Yourself for Success Without Losing Your Edge.
One thing hit me hard
Writers, especially part-time writers, are experts at pushing themselves to the edge. We invent worlds, juggle jobs and families, chase side hustles, and then punish ourselves for not doing enough.
Creativity becomes a double-edged sword, fueling us while quietly bleeding us dry with unrealistic expectations.
But Dr. Anderson’s S.E.L.F. Formula gave me a reminder worth sharing because it’s so simple it almost feels silly. But simple doesn’t mean easy.
S.E.L.F. = Sleep. Exercise. Look Forward. Fuel.
S – Sleep:
Aim for 7–9 hours. Burnout starts when we borrow tomorrow’s energy to survive today.
E – Exercise:
A moving body sparks a moving mind. Even a short walk can reset your creative engine. Keep it doable. 30 minutes a day.
L – Look Forward:
Book that coffee date. Plan that movie night. Anticipation is a powerful mood booster.
F – Fuel:
Eat well. Stay hydrated. Your brain runs on more than caffeine.
These aren’t hacks. They’re the basics, the absolutely essential fundamentals, we tend to skip when the deadline monster starts breathing down our neck.
And they’re based on science, not myth. Do these things consistently and you’ll feel better. Physically and mentally.
The episode goes deeper
Especially on the toxic combo of perfectionism and self-talk that keeps high achievers stuck. If you’ve ever heard the voice whisper, “It’s not good enough, so why bother?” go give it a listen.
And honestly? I’m hearing that voice a lot right now.
You’re not writing enough.
You keep missing deadlines.
Your novel is taking forever to wrap up.
Your work isn’t good enough.
You’re not good enough.
Constantly reminding me that I’m not living up to my own impossible standards. Despite exceeding them in one area already.
I realised I was cherry-picking what to be sad about. Ignoring the results and cost of preparing for an ultra, only to feel bad that time was limited for writing.
That’s why this stuck with me. Because I’m doing all four of these things. Sleep, exercise, looking forward, fueling well for my running training.
But it’s my own self-talk that’s cutting me down.
That voice is the real blade.
Mental Health Awareness Week
This week is Mental Health Awareness Week, and my friend Candice from Candid Collab shared a newsletter about it too: Do you smell burnt toast… or is it just me?
has always been beautifully candid about her mental health, something I deeply respect. We’ve often shared about our own personal demons.It makes it easier just talking about it.
Instead of pretending to be alright, all of the time.
Given the serendipity of these two moments, I thought I had to share this framework with you.
Think of it like the oxygen mask on an airplane. You put yours on first so you can help others. Your creativity works the same way.
Take a breath.
Check your S.E.L.F.
And remember.
You can’t write the next great novel if you’re running on empty. 💜
If this helped, if this made you a little more aware of what you need, please do me a small favour and hit the like button to help Read / Write / Run grow.
Thank you!
* I learnt from the Netflix show Adolescence that purple hearts apparently mean “horny” among Gen Z & Alpha.
Luckily, I’m an Elder Millennial and I don’t give a shit. I like purple hearts because they’re purple.
And that’s my favourite colour.
At the moment.
Aerobic exercise has always worked best for me, but the older I get, the harder it is to consistently maintain a high level of it. I get in about 30 minutes of hiking a day, when I really should be doing 60-plus to get the full benefits.
Ahhhh this is SO true - gotta have your own air mask on or there's no point!! I think when we get stressed out with work, life and all the things we often put ourselves last. But that is the wrong way to go about it - I'm starting to learn to put myself first, but that doesn't happen if I don't have good systems!